Microaggressions

This week I went into the infant room at my job because the babies were crying nonstop. I wanted to offer my assistance since my students were down for their nap. My co-teacher was with them. She wanted me to go because we could hear them crying through two closed doors and down the hallway. I noticed a baby that was on the floor crying. None of the teachers were showing him any attention. I went  to pick him up and they told me, “He is okay.” I picked him up anyway. The baby was Hispanic. I started to talk to him and rock him, trying to calm him down. There were three teachers in the classroom.; two white teachers and one black teacher. One of the white teachers came over to where the baby and I were sitting and said, “He is just use to being held all day. You know that is what Hispanics do.” I looked at her and I know she knew I was mad by the look on my face. I said, “No that is not what “we” do.” She said, “What are you talking about Mrs. Taylor? I said Hispanic.” I said, “I know. I am Hispanic.” She could have gone through the floor. I said, “I held my babies, but not all day. That is not what we do. We take care of our babies and attend to their needs. This baby is crying, so he needs something.” I wanted to snatch her, but I didn’t. Only God knows what she would have said then. She was implying that all the Hispanics do is have babies and stay at home and hold them. She went as far as to say the mother doesn’t work so if the baby is not adjusting she needs to come and get him. I can only pray that God gives me the strength to deal with her in a way that is like him. I already know that going to my director is not a choice. 

Every baby in that classroom deserves to be treated the same regardless of their ethnicity. The babies are innocent and need someone that is going to be nurturing and caring. Teachers like her do not need to be in our profession; especially with the small children who don’t have the words to tell if she does something to them. If there is anyone that has any suggestions, please let me know. If I have no proof, I have no case. 

Perspective on Diversity and Culture

I have such a diverse collection of friends. It was hard for me to decide which ones I could ask. I knew that each of them would give me a different definition on  diversity and culture. I asked more than three friends because I was interested in what my more colorful friends thought about culture and diversity, but I am only going to post  three. Some of the definitions were not “appropriate”. Remember I said some of my friends/associates are colorful. 

Kelvin Shaw (God-Brother): He said that what diversity means to him is that he stands out amongst the crowd. It means that you are different and those differences are very apparent. He was born with polio on one side of his body. His disability has not crippled him in doing the things that he loves and wants to do. He is a college graduate, married with three children and two grandchildren, and he has his own business. He has never let his disability hinder him. It has only made him stronger. Some people with the same disability lay around and wait for their check to come, but not him. He does not limit himself to what he can and will try to do.

Kelvin Shaw- Culture is the values and beliefs that we have. We are born into the beliefs and values of our family. It is the traditions that we continue throughout life because that is what our family did. He said that he still uses wood for heat because his grandfather always did. He puts it into a furnace on the outside of his house. 

Sharina Campbell (Colleague): Diversity is when you are willing to experience new things. Your likes and dislikes may be different from you family members. You are labeled different because you don’t listen to the same music, eat the same food, or dress the same as other people. you are accepting of the things around you and less likely to judge. She said she is diverse because she is a lesbian and is open about her relationship. She said that she knew she was different when she was 15 years old. Her siblings accept her, but her mother does not.

Culture- The family that you are born in. It is everything that makes you who you are. Your culture is what you identify with. It is your family, where you live, how you celebrate special occasions, dress, eat, and so much more.

Doris Bansah (Friend): Diversity is being different in an environment that is full of similarities. She is from Ghana. She has learned to eat and dress the way people do in America because she was always looked upon. She has chosen not to teach her children her native language because they were born in the United States. 

Culture- Taking on the habits and beliefs of the environment around you. It is adapting to the cultures that you live with. She is an American Citizen now and is trying to learn about our culture. 

Kelvin has not allowed society to label him. He has never thought of himself as “Handicap”. I have never heard him use that word. He has always found his own limitations by attempting a task and finding out for himself is he can do it. When people stare at him it doesn’t seem to bother him. 

Sharina is very open about her sexuality. Her partner also works for the agency. They both welcome all questions. In the beginning I was uncomfortable being around her, but I had to come to grips with my own biases. Sharina does not categorize herself as being gay. She says that she is free to make choices and that is what she chose. 

I do not agree with Doris’ decision about not teaching her children about their culture. Yes they were born in the United States, but being African is still a part of their culture. I can only hope that one day she will come to understand that it is important that her children know who they truly are; all parts of them. 

As I talked to them, I didn’t notice the emotional and motivational aspects of social identity. All of them are comfortable and confident people. They have established careers and personal lives. I am so proud that they have not let society stop them from being true to themselves. We are all part of a diverse culture. I might not agree with the same things, but that is what makes us unique.  

My Family Culture

I could only imagine the mixed emotions and confusion that I would be suffering if I had to be relocated to another country and labeled as a refugee. I started to think about the different cultures that we have in the United States and wonder if they had the same thoughts that I had when I started this assignment. It would be hard for me to choose a limited amount of items because at that moment the smallest thing that we possess takes on a whole new meaning for us.

I would gather all the photos of my family that I could fit into a photo album and take with me. I have a photo album dedicated to the birth of my children (1 per child), my wedding, and pictures of me, my mother, granny, and sister when we were growing up. All of these albums have a lifetime of memories at different stages in my life. I would put as many as I could in an album so that I had my memories and also a security blanket with me. The album would be my security blanket because it is the substance and ingredient to who I am.

I would take my bible with me. I will need encouragement that everything is going to be alright for me and my family. When I am feeling lost and alone, I open up the bible and read passages that give me strength and remind me of who I have faith in. Because of God’s favor on my life, I know that the journey that I am about to make will be safe and a blessed journey.

The third item that I would choose to take with me is my Jazz CD. Jazz music comforts me when I have had a rough day. It puts my mind at ease and I am able to relax and rest. Who knows if I would be able to relate to the customs in my new home. I want to have things with me that I can identify with as would anyone coming to a strange country.

If I am not allowed to carry but one item it would be my photo album. The pictures of my family would keep me grounded on where I came from and the good times that I had. My faith allows me to carry the word of God with me wherever I go, so I wouldn’t need the bible. I pray a prayer of comfort each day as I continue my journey. Over time I would probably find some music that I would grow to love. The new country may even have Jazz music there.

Family is important to me and I have tried to catch every special occasion in a picture. Sometimes my family and I sit and look at them. I often though it was because we were bored or because we had guests over. Now I realize that they mean so much more. Whenever I am missing my son, mother, niece, nephew, granny, and sister all I have to do is open up the photo album. As I look at each picture I find myself saying, “I remember when I took that. or I remember when this happened.” Like the saying goes: A PICTURE IS WORTH A 1000 WORDS.